The Crap We Do For Beauty

As I sit here hiding from people with opinions so that I don’t have to hear comments about my current look, I am thinking about all of the work we put ourselves through in the name of beauty. When I say we, I mean all of us. Not just women (I have known some pretty high maintenance men in my days). And some of these things can be quite painful. Plucking eyebrows, lip hairs, nose hairs, chin hairs, brazilian waxing, plastic surgery, and tons of more treatments you can go get. I myself had a breast reduction years ago… partly because my back hurt and I had huge bra indentations in my shoulders… but also partly I got tired of looking like I could tuck my boobies into the waistband of my pants.

Anyhow, I woke up this morning and looked in the mirror, and automatically the warning bells were screaming, “Damn Angela! You are starting to look bad!” So having a completely sane thought I decided that living in a third world country was no reason to not keep up with my appearance. So I went to the store to find a shower cap so that I could do a deep conditioning treatment on my frizzy, hard to tame, natural hair, a razor to shave off much more than a week of jungle growth from my legs (don’t cringe too much! I wear pants and floor length skirts every single day), tweezers, and teeth whitening strips. The trip was not 100% successful, and I went with my buddy Andy which made it even more difficult cause guys have an opinion about everything. We found a razor but not teeth whitening anything. No tweezers. And while looking for a plain shower cap, all I could find were ones with drawings and designs on them. I wasn’t going to get one, but I let Mr. Andy persuade me to let him pick out an “Awesome Shower Cap” for me.  With my beauty purchases (an a roll of Oreos) I headed back to my place.

So now I am sitting on my bed re-watching episodes of “Bones”with a glob of conditioner

Now thats gorgeous!

on my head covered by a shower cap with a picture of a monkey wearing a had and yielding a gun of some sort on my head (Thanks Andy), shaved legs, eyebrows that look like caterpillars have grown over them, and teeth stained from drinking tea every day for the past year. (I even have freshly painted lavender finger nails.) And I feel exhausted.  Is it considered pampering if you do all of this yourself or is pampering when someone else does it for you? Right now I am praying for just a few days in the States so that I am resemble my normal self again (just less fat).

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7 thoughts on “The Crap We Do For Beauty

  1. Loving it! Even though I don’t live in a 3rd world country (huge respect for what you’re doing!), I go through phases where all this “pampering” is the last thing on my mind. And one day I’ll look in the mirror going: “WTF were you THINKING?!?!?” and start a pampering session right away.
    I totally agree though: pampering yourself is pretty exhausting and I’d much rather have someone else do it for me. Only who’s going to pay for all that?!

  2. I’m going overseas and am dreading the well water that is sooo hard to brush off. i will though get my teeth cleaned when i come back. the tea stains i just started getting and gave up tea. its really bad.

  3. if you can get a hold of some sea salt, lemon juice, and baking soda, it works just as well as, and is much cheaper, than chemical teeth whitening stuff. and the roll of oreos comment almost made me get dressed and go to the store, just now.

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